'Bing Crosby Ice Cream. I can't believe it either, at least according to an old copy of Mojo music magazine I found in my Dad's loft' An Ep

by Mark Wynn

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    Dirty Work is a magazine thing I make which has gig diaries and cut up bits of magazines and rants and letters to Johnny Depp from Holden Caulfield in it...

    Buy it... It's better than just the download... And you'll also get some daft post... and I like post... Maybe you don't like receiving post... Maybe you shouldn't buy iy...

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These are more songs from the new pansy melodic underground. You don't like. You go listen to whatever it is I don't know what I'm talking about. Stop. These are about the resemblance. I wrote them so somebody could ask me if I had sex in Aldi... No peoples. Please pay attention to what I am saying: I had a dream about it; I didn't actually do it. They are also about feeling uncomfortable in the girls section of clothes shops, discovering shady aspects of your family's past, listening to people explain to other people that their current environment is not conducive to the creation of their art, blue cars, takeaway food, Tang Hall park and the standing around the same place looking at all the people who are a lot younger thinking: 'You weren't even alive when Nevermind was released is a ridiculous way of looking at anything, I reject that statement....

Each track is actually a cover of More Than a Feeling. No, that's a lie.... Actually no, each song is my interpretation of the book The Outsiders by SE Hinton. I read it when I was 13, I read it when I was 22, I read it when I was 27... I like that mother fucking book... Need to see what the other ones are like. But that involves ordering... And I don't like to do that stuff... Oh life... Tragic life...


released 14 August 2014

Mark - noise
Sam - recording of noise

Photo by Steve... The artist captured behind the tent at the festival drinking the discovered bevvy wishing there was a roof or not being bothered by this at all....



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Track Name: I Was More Prolific When I Was Living In Greece
Dull conversation in a cold pub. Tryna read the Penguin book of French short stories. 'Music's supposed to make you...' Music's supposed to make you what. A man at the bar discussing his lack of space to paint, inspiration please. And I was a lot more prolific when I was living in Greece, Course you were, now banging on about Australia, inspiration please.

'So sparse, artistic, yes. Very touristy here. Very annoying walking here,' a man at the bar discussing how he's a poet. A lack of inspiration are you gonna find it. Sat there drinking tea and jacking yourself off to the girl who looks to have just turned 18...

And I was a lot more prolific when I was living in Greece.

Course you were...
Track Name: Aldi Sex Song
In a dream last night we were screwing on the floor in Aldi. Shall I buy you something I think I said or at least the suggestion was made, at least the suggestion was made. Then we went to the town talking to the man who drank like a fish which meant he was always well hydrated, and he didn't know when to leave so he left. He didn't know when to leave so he left.

In the other place there were people and they made us feel older than we were.

We sat in the back discussing takeaway food and then the man in the mac said he couldn't come on friday it was your birthday and it was a surprise, it was your birthday and it was a surprise. He left and then the time came to leave for us again, we walked into the street I misplaced my feet and fell you were wearing a green raincoat. I said I liked your green raincoat.

In the lack of light your face looked like a switchblade in the lack of light we went to your place. And as we walked I questioned the logic of going to bed with someone who had a face like a knife - was that a premonition? Your skin was pale and white I wasn't wearing any clothes. Your skin was pale we couldn't wait until home we fucked in a bush we fucked in a bush. Fuckin in the bushes not that one. Not that naff Oasis song.

Somewhere in the bush we heard a police siren there were lights there were boots with men attached to them. We didn't know what to do. I was still attached to you. They carted us off in a pink paddy wagon. Why it was pink I don't recall. Does that even matter we were arrested for public indecency in Tang Hall park for public indecency.

I tried to explain how I was asleep it was a dream. They said to me who has dreams that start in Aldi. I said I do. They seemed skeptical and unsure and then they smiled at me and let me go. I woke up in a bush alone nowhere near my home. There was this note in my top pocket and I opened it up and read it in a Shangri Las fashion....
Track Name: The Girl Who Looked Like Bobby Gillespie
There was a girl who looked like Bobby Gillespie she wore a denim jacket and some kind of red shirt paper skin squinting eyes coloured lights in the faces of all those who stood next to the girl who looked like Bobby Gillespie.

She, she came out with it once whilst riding her bike she did not need those things in the hall they got in the way of the girl so she took them to the landfill with the help of a friend who had a blue car they drove in the rain to the place one evening in spring

They dumped them there in the ground and then he drove her home that night she went to get smashed in a bar. And nobody asked where all her things were. She knew that they wouldn't cos they didn't care.

She didn't speak she only spoke when spoken to in her own way mumbling her way to the door and then she'd leave on her own at every party on her own cos she wasn't into people at all she only went cos it was something to do.

We spoke a while on the stairs in a bar this didn't happen cos as I've said she didn't speak but I imagined we did cos I wanted to imagined we did cos I wanted to. It was light or it was dark or it was dead I don't recall does that even matter.

Speaking of Bobby Gillespie and the girl who looked like him. There's been a bit of trouble in Bridport. Bobby wants Gav's Mam's flag but she won't allow it. She ses who are you Bobby. Primal Scream is that some kind of exercise to relieve stress. Possibly he replys in my minds eye not knowing him at all.

This ends here she said one time when it was getting late. She took herself out like they do in the films but no bit parts no supports no caterers no big awards just the girl who looked like Bobby Gillespie
Track Name: Sedative
I walk through streets said the man who walks through streets kick out his teeth don't let him in or show him anything you wish to keep hold of in the canteen where we sit, discussing everything, as if, it were a concept one we could dissown all this talk of talking it up is talking it down on the street I am in as much trouble as the next, the next is almost dead.

I'm in love with the girl the girl is gone. I'm in love with the world is wrong.

Irrational, cruel, distrusting of it is now asking:

Who ain't afraid is who is dead is who is meant to get this letter I sent I made it out clear no one is a s near as you are far no limitation is walking drunk and after dark say it's wrong provide a something for this which is killing me I want your medication escape yeah a sedative x4

Don't look at me, you know you torture me, you know you torture me, I half like it see me in the back behind a blank faced expression.
Track Name: Houses on the Green Grass
There's houses on the green grass and so an so's now dead. Forget where you left that kid who was once what he was before. now narcissistic, cynical. Have a pull. Shut up. There's houses on the green grass.

There's houses on the green grass and so an so was a funeral director. Never out of work that one. Yeah good one. anymore from the memory bank. After the fact is a pointless exercise. One he can't put down. No one comes around anymore. That's cos you told them where to go: away.

Man hug, that fist thing. Golden Earring making you drive like a dick. Cigarette. Yeah, let's have a cigarette in your car and look like dicks at the traffic lights. All night and there's a gadgey in here who knows everyone but no one at all. How insightful. Fake handshake. Is that your real accent? No it's fake. Fake middle class or whatever. Fake working class. Fake scum class. Fake middle class or whatever. Don't say uou're from Leeds. It doesnt' suit your place of birth home and upbringing. Don't say you're from Leeds. Unless of course you are, from Leeds.

Because there's houses on the green grass and I'd do excapism but I'd upset my mum she wouldn't understand and neither would I. One on the door and one on the light outside. I'd say come for a beer anyone but I wouldn't want them here anyone. Expecially when I want them here...

Swagger swagger man swagger. Man swagger through to rooms to use the facilities and come rolling right back. Swagger swagger man swagger. Are you aware of the so many ways to lose your lover. There's another but badly? Really? Shut up, say something else. It's boring. You're boring. It's an adopted trait. Wait a minute, did you just say you like Tom Waits. Course you did. Like a shy sod, walking through the girls section of a clothes shop. Ooh knickers. Am I six again. Men not being men. And a long walk home, not wanting to be going, home.
Track Name: Your Nan Is Not An Invalid, She's a Real Person
One three to do list check the meter pay the bill make the tea for the kid who doesn't want to turn the TV off just yet get good at cryptic crosswords cos steve does them and he's got you into them as well. Hang your washing out in the wet cos it smells a bit of petrol eat a cornbeff sandwich in a bungalow with your nan in new Earswick who has a bad leg but a good head. Don't forget your specks you might need them she said you had a relative who once did a lot of bad things. Changed the hands on the clock of Queen Anne's school. I thought it was in Acomb but it's not.His Dad used to knock him round a bit x2

Remember to forget a time when you didn't feel good in her presence I'd rather walk along Haxby road in the dark being afraid of being attacked by something which is absent your Granddad was a bastard but he was a nice man don't forget to be a nice man Mark. Okay I won't Nan.

Time was I would look around and he was there keep it to yourself but I miss him I could of taped the bond film but I've seen it before in the sixties with your Dad there's biscuits in the barrel jam in the cupboard get fully fed and found out he used to travel around singin as well used to go to Halifax. I've never been to Halifax except on the train.

Your Nan is not an invalid she's a real person ask her a question your not as clever as you think. Ask her a question she's been around a lot longer than you

Speculate argue she was the apple of his eye the sun did shine out of her backside arguments yes but you never let the sun go down on your wrath. Ask who said that. Alice who went as well and didn't recognize her daughter. Reiterate a point.

Alzheimers is a fucker X10