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A Madeira Cake is a nice thing to have in your tinfoil

from Damp Towels Stink Drama by Mark Wynn

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lyrics

Two swans in the sea, I saw,
and my hair has never looked right;
someone got blown up tonight.
A few people were in the bookshop, after time,
they were having some drinks, I saw.
It was strange to see; and all the birds in the world
waking up at, different times in different trees,
some go low above the ground, and others
you can hold in your hands, if you are trained.
Trained. You go to the place, you get trained.

You go to the place, you get paid, you get told how to act,
what to say, when to turn up. Buy a pre-packaged sandwich,
on the food-court, take out the lettuce eat it stood still in a lift,
going down to the ground, and then out, look at it from a distance,
a big thing filled with things to be sold, sat there at the bus stop;
four more hours to go until home and sleep, so much sleep,
until the Big Sleep,
is a book.

A maderia cake is a nice thing
to have in your tinfoil, I am no longer in love
with being off my nut, there was a man in the place,
he had a bag full of James Cagney films in a bag.
Some girls danced around him, he just continued drinking his pint,
then bought another, and another, had a piss, got a taxi, got a taxi,
paid for the taxi.

That building they blew up in the Bond film,
I saw it from the bus it was not blown up, which was strange.

Strange, my teeth hurt
less than they did. when I was a kid,
there is a heater in the shower
I have to put my face on it
three times, to make sure it is off
sometimes more than
three times.


And a man said to me, this morning,
there’s a nuclear submarine, in the Clyde,
and I looked outside, stood up eating,
cos my back is hurting all down my side.
And there’s a pain in my chest, too, I sighed.

You know what that is, he ses, that’s heartburn.
And what is heartburn? The really bizarre thing I find,
is no one I know or have ever met, reads these magainzes.
Getting in them seems to be something that seems worthwhile
but I don’t know why. And then I was London on Sunday
and Mike sent me to the shop to buy lard, for Yorkshire Puddings

And then when I got to the shop,
I couldn’t find any and asked a man,
and he said, Lard? - like he’d never heard of it.

There was no lard in Tescoes that time,
I went back to the flat, and told Mike.
He put on his shoes to sort it, I went with him to prove it,
‘Look, there’s no lard, or suitable substitute.’
I bought some ice-cream; he walked up the street to the
Co-op was closed, he walked further to Stepney Green,
got some lard, and then a bus back.
Sometime after this, we ate everything.

And they were really nice, the yorkshire puddings,
sort of still eggy but not still eggy, and the way that they rise,
with the door shut, is not a metaphor / for life, though
it could be, if this were a philosophical cook-book,
but it’s not a philosophical cook-book.

And i’ve got too many rings, you know me.

credits

from Damp Towels Stink Drama, released August 28, 2018

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Mark Wynn York, UK

Based on a true story.

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